Sunday, November 30, 2008

steering clear



"i don't think i'm gonna go to LA anymore
i don't think i'm gonna go to LA anymore
i don't know what it's like to land and not race to your door
i don't think i'm gonna go to LA anymore

i don't think i'm gonna go to LA anymore
i'm not sure that i really ever could
hold on to a hotel key in your bedroom neighborhood
with me sleep walking in hollywood

i'm gonna steer clear
burn up in your atmosphere
i'm gonna steer clear
'cause i'd die if i saw you
i'd die if i didn't see you there
so i don't think i'm gonna go to LA anymore

i don't think i'm gonna go to LA anymore
i'd get lost on the boulevard at night
without your voice to tell me 'i love you, take a right'
the ten and the two is the loneliest sight

i think i'm gonna stay, gonna stay on the grey
think i'm gonna stay
all the street lights say 'never mind, never mind'
all the canyon lines say 'never mind'
the sunset says 'i see this all the time'
never mind, never you mind"

- from "in your atmosphere" by john mayer


i try to avoid the things and places that remind me of you. old twine, a guitar, black t-shirts, baskin robbins, dirty white sneakers, klcc, weird emo rock songs. but it's hard to stay away when those are the very places and things that make me smile.

nothing's ever happened, nothing ever does. i'm holding onto a frayed rope of nothing just because that's all i have left. a futile attempt at maintaining a connection to you. i wouldn't die, but a part of me would sting if i saw you, sting if i didn't see you. it's a painful way of knowing that i still have hope. better than feeling nothing at all.

lishun at 7:12 PM

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