Saturday, December 08, 2007

return of the talk

my mother gave me "the talk" again.

you know. the one that goes "i'm not rushing you or anything, but if you wait till you graduate, all the good guys would be either married or engaged or in a relationship or 'it's complicated' (ok fine she didn't say the 'it's complicated' bit) so make sure you find someone before you graduate ok? and you don't need to be choosy or wait for the 'right one'. as long as he loves you. you don't even need to love him that much. just as long as he loves you."


so what? i'm supposed to be actively seeking? i'm already praying and working on my friendships and just doing what i think is important. am i supposed to be...scouting the prospects? purposely trying to get their attention? taking things by the rein? go for a makeover, act cute and helpless and clueless and in need of a rescue, laugh a little crisper and girly-er, flirt, be exceptionally nice, take dancing lessons, bake cupcakes, mould my interests into theirs, shower praises on them, and everything else that is on purpose and nothing to do with what i'm really like?

i will draw the line at maybe taking better care of myself, but i'd rather stick my arm up a cow's nether regions and deliver a calf than to straighten my hair and lavish my attention on guys on purpose just because i'm not getting any younger or because my mother is worried about me. i'm just not going to go down that path anymore.

besides, i believe in doing my best and relying on God to do the rest. if it's His will that i remain single so i can concentrate on doing what i should be doing, fine. if He wills that i have someone to travel the road He's prepared for me with, then that's great. for now, i'm just going to do what i'm doing and continue praying.

now, excuse me while i go shop for shoes.

lishun at 10:13 AM