Wednesday, January 06, 2010


"You have heard that it was said to the people long ago, 'Do not murder, and anyone who murders will be subject to judgment.' But I tell you that anyone who is angry with his brother will be subject to judgment. Again, anyone who says to his brother, 'Raca,' is answerable to the Sanhedrin. But anyone who says, 'You fool!' will be in danger of the fire of hell.

"Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to your brother; then come and offer your gift.

"Settle matters quickly with your adversary who is taking you to court. Do it while you are still with him on the way, or he may hand you over to the judge, and the judge may hand you over to the officer, and you may be thrown into prison. I tell you the truth, you will not get out until you have paid the last penny."
- matthew 5:21-26

when my mind fills with sarcastic replies, biting comments and hurtful-on-purpose words to say to you, i think about Jesus extending murder to simply thinking hateful thoughts about someone.

while i'm thankful for the reminder from the Holy Spirit and the stern warning that comes with it, i know there is no way for me to do what Jesus said without His grace. it's just so much easier to be spiteful and spit poisonous words and later stand back to watch my brother (or sister) limp off with a broken spirit, fooling myself into believing that it was a lesson he or she had to learn anyway.

it's so much easier to give in and let bitterness win the battle. at this very moment, it is gaining ground. but no, it will not advance any further!

there is much to repent for, much to surrender. yet in the midst of passion, it is still far easier to commit murder in my heart than to reconcile with the one who has caused a simmering rage in me.

Lord, i repent, i repent! please help me! i need You! =(

lishun at 5:15 PM